No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
