Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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