remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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