Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
