We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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