im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
This baby is an asshole
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
