i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Randomize
