Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
