where am i from again
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I want her autograph on my taint
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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