She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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