Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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