The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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