: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Randomize
