Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
