She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
birth control should be required to get into college
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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