Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize