The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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