When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He shit in the fireplace
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
