it wasn't lemon gatorade
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Two words: blizzard sex
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
