i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
