we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
