I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
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