I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
