haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
She said her name was "party"
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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