i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
