he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
Randomize
