Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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