so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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