If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
