Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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