i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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