i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
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