I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Randomize