I love black thongs
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
