I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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