names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
