You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
This toilet bowl is my home.
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