But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
