i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize