I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
