Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Randomize
