so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Randomize
