I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
