discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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