then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize