She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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