I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Randomize
