i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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