id be glad to
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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