dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
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